“That’s a nice bike. Did you build it yourself?” The woman was short and had gray hair that spilled past her pink visor, ending at her shoulders. She pressed her lips into a thin line, stained a shade of pink similar to my bike. Another, younger woman stood behind her, looking on but saying nothing.

More music pours from the tents dotting the strip of dirt that ran along the National Mall, where I had stumbled into a Christian music festival, Awaken the Dawn.

I glanced at the people passing behind her, trotting up and down the National Mall, and shook my head at what felt like a ridiculous question. “No, I’m not that technically inclined.”

She smiled and nodded. “I met this guy, Chinese or Japanese, who built his own motorcycle. It was impressive, with all these gadgets.”

“That’s cool.”

“Will you pray with us?” she asked

“No thanks.”

“Are you a man of god?”

I shook my head. “No.”

The woman kept smiling, taking me in through gray eyes. She cocked her head. “Have you thought about becoming one?”

“Nope.” I shook my head again, unlocked my bike, and hopped on.

“We’ll pray for you.”

“Thanks. I hope you enjoy that.”

I biked off without looking back, passing the clumps of people attending the festival. Eventually I came across a van covered in the kind of posterboard you’d see at a protest, along with the kinds of slogans you’d see at a protest. I spot the word bukkake on one of the signs. Another encouraged people to become expert “sword swallowers” by practicing with priests’ penises, so that Jesus can cum in their mouths.

I was on the street side though, so I couldn’t see the van’s owner. Curiosity yanked me over there, because I couldn’t go any further without seeing what the person behind all this had in mind. As I parked my bike once more, I noticed the people gawking. Some shook their heads. Others commented to one another, mouths agape, about the horrid slogans.

I came to the other side of the van to see a slight, grizzled man chatting with a younger man. From what little I overheard, they’re discussing whether the man’s signs will be effective. The grizzled man tells the younger man that they got him to come over and engage. The young man admits that they felt like a literal sign to perform ministry. They continued to chat and he was thoughtful in his responses, even though he seemed out of his depth at times.